Do You Really Respect Yourself?

I recently started reading “Without Respect. A Social Crisis.” by Byung-Chul Han. Until now, the thing that stood out the most for me was this concept: if you don’t respect yourself, you aren’t able to respect others.

I’ve been thinking a lot about this and all its implications. And that brings me back to Gabor Maté’s book “The Myth of Normal.” One of the main ideas presents the unfortunate fate of someone being born into a disruptive and abusive society. There, the individual must comply with the arbitrary rules and rulers of a sick and narcissistic environment. Most often, in order to survive, the person becomes abusive and ruthless too – or, in simpler terms, someone without respect for themselves or others.

Violence usually breeds violence, and a society that doesn’t allow people to experience life at its fullest creates a vacuum, and an ever-growing need to rise above others by whatever means necessary.

It’s easier, humanly speaking, to follow the more “logical” path: I was hurt, so I’ll hurt others too. But that path is deeply destructive, and it only breeds more of the same. Breaking the cycle isn’t easy. But it can end with you.

Right now, the biblical commandment of loving thy neighbor the way you love yourself makes more sense than ever. In fact, for that to happen, first someone needs to love/respect themselves.

If someone fails to see the humanity inside themselves, they will not be able to see the other as human.

Do you see yourself as a human? Do you respect yourself? Do you really love yourself?